i met you when I was 18

Friday

Procrastinated from doing Taste of Research application and it was literally only 100 words -.-

Did a whole lotta nothing. 

Went out at night for Selz's birthday. It was way more wholesome than I expected HAHAH. There were only a handful of us but we kicked the night off at Chinatown Noodle Restaurant (did you know there's also a Chinese Noodle Restaurant people so original with their names). Their food was actually so good and so cheap!!! Shared a bottle of voddy between five and got a bit tipsy.

for once I'm not doing a peace sign

Had some Hokkaido milk and green tea ice cream from Oh Matchaaa was super yum. Maybe will just get Hokkaido milk next time.

Then got Alan's ear pierced? Then went to sanct for a bit, saw Feng then went to like yenno the big caps place to take pictures

Then home timeeee. Had to trek to Ashfield RSL club so my parents could pick me up

Saturday

Posted on IG again and like srs anxiety

Tutored my kid hehehE

legit don't know what I did. I think I watched some things. Oh yeah took a depression nap.

Was considering whether to go to Eddie's or not and then at like 7:30 I was too ceebs and my sis was home too so we just chilled and casually watched 2 movies together. 

Phantom Thread: weird, kinda slow at the beginning but a bit insane.

Ingrid Goes West: so funny go watch it.

Sunday

Doing more of nothin :) 

Maybe go to the Star tonight? idk so ceebs don't wanna do work don't wanna do anything.

Harry Zhanga got this message from EMMA BIRRELL omg 

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big boi post + WIESoc Ball 2018

knockout promotion is on DRUGZ lol thinking of doing something like this for WIESoc next year but what requires such edgy promo?? INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY BRUNCH BE LIKE:

The next Female to enter the Brunch via the Elevator - One of the most successful engineers from Rio Tinto, Kimberley Stacy Smith XD FUCK i'm so lame

and every day the KO fomo is getting stronger...

Khang was like:

"you have 3 months to figure out how to fake your death."

"Its your cousin's wedding? So what?"

"Pretend you have gastro"

THE FUCK IS THIS GROUP CALLED HAPPY CATS FOR IF U GONNA MAKE ME DEPRESSED ON THIS MONDAY MORNING

Tired of being someone that you have to tread lightly around

"whatchu doing in your break?"

BITCH IF U CARE LMAO

dum dum dum dum

this is a banger and im very late I know but FUCK

I should've stayed at home

'Cause right now I see all these people that love me

But I still feel alone

Can't help but check my phone

I could've made you mine

But no, it wasn't meant to be and see, I wasn't made for you

And you weren't made for me

Though it seemed so easy

Sunday

Had WIESoc picnic bonding in the daytime. It was actually pretty fun HAHAHHA I thought it would be boring cus WIESoc things are sometimes boring. BUT YEAH we had a "potluck" which apparently is when everyone brings their own dish. Idk if Chinese people have a word for it cus that's what always happens at outdoor events???

I brought dumplings which everyone ate hehe 0 effort. RIP Lucy who brought so many summer rolls but she brought them too late and everyone was already full. Yiyi and Niina brought both their sausage dogs but Lini is a savage so they didn't really get along. Vanessa also brought her labrador! Played mafia, Teresa and I were such good detectives and full found the mafia XD

Then went back home and chilled. Went to Amy Lim's house to hang with Phuc, Khang and Jo. We did nothingggg everyone was a bit down.

Monday

Couldn't find the cat and then we see her in our neighbour's window like

Spent the whole day doing MMAN2100 group assignment and I'M SO TRIGGERED BY PEOPLE IN MY GROUP omg like you send me your part literally 15 minutes before its due with no context, no explanation about where it goes, whether I have to rotate the page or not LIKE FK. So I hand it in like 2 minutes late and then that person acts like it wasn't her fault smh.

Cut sister's birthday cake miam.

After being super triggered, went over to Phuc's house to help him cut WIESoc tickets then we both headed to Selz's house to surprise her at 12 am for her birthday!!! We got her a woolies cake but like lit the sparklers too early so by the time she got to her door they were almost out. BUT IT WAS CUTEEE. Jo, Khang, Alan and Darren also came and we sat and talked about random shit until 2 ish at her house.

Tuesday

Another chill day. Did my MMAN3000 assignment, tried to fix my resume. 

kept watching Maniac which is soooooo weird I love it. I love futuristic worlds they r so colourful.

Been listening to more rex orange county 6? 

Wednesday

WIESoc Exec Training day

Legit social anxiety peaking the WHOLE DAY omg I felt like I was back in primary school having to make like powerpoints about ourselves then present. BUT IT WAS REALLY FUN!!!!! Like we had to do personality tests and put up what type we were and what kind of strengths and weaknesses we had. Also had to present what we thought makes a good team and what makes us happy :) it was really wholesome but yeah i was so nervous for all the little presentations and it was in front of like 7 people. 

After training finished, we went to Coco Cubano for chill lunch. Shared a haloumi bread thing with Niina then drove her home and headed to Stephen's house to resource with Amy. Spoiler alert, we did not resource. WE WERE SOOOO ceebs and ended up making MAC N CHEESE. but amy fuckekd up and put the milk into the breadcrumbs so like it turned into this weird risotto like goop.

popcorn - SWEET AND SALTY YUM!!!

But we just didnt eat the breadcrumb topping and the actual mac n cheese itself turned out good. SO CHEESY I could feel the extra weight afterwards. 

went home at 10 to pack for long day tomorrow.

Thursday

Had a leadership day for eng club executives and I was expecting to be bored out of my mind BUT it was actually really interesting!!  The guy who ran it, Josh Farr, gave sososo many insights about leadership and like understanding what motivates people AND SELF BRANDING LMAO

Got free food and a notebook from it hehe. Met some new people and it was just very enlightening. I had some of their really strong coffee though and like I WAS SHAKING SO HARD MY TEETH WERE CHATTERING.

WIESoc Ball 2018 (my mental breakdown) 

Then ran to Niina's house so we (incl. Yiyi) could head there together. Got off ze bus and bought soju (which they didn't even end up drinking) then niina did my eyeliner and we got changedddd

Ball was fun fun fun for the most part and then shit happened towards the end and my dumb drunk ass just COULDN'T keep my mouth shut. Exposed myself a bit too much emotionally but Brenda, Lizzie and even Phuc was soooo nice and I felt very loved hehe. Salmon was soooo yum.

wow balloons to distract from my pregnancy

HEHE dis the filter i made :)

I'm the biggest hype man when I'm drunk HAHAH just kept clapping randomly during peoples speeches and cheering

LEGS HURT SO MUCH TODAY OMG

anyway happy part over

was almost in tears by the end of the night and decided I didn't wanna sleep over at Niina's anymore so I took the last train home. had to wait at Redfern for like 27 minutes but Selz called me and I tried to drunkenly help her with her coding assignment the whole way back home HAHAHHAHA it was sooooo hard trying to think logically when you're so drunk you could chunder. twas a struggle but at least wasn't alone with my thoughts otherwise would've probably cried.

ANYWAY I'm so done with everything like last night I was legit considering just locking myself in my house for the rest of my life and never having to see anyone outside of my family ever again

BUT that just dramatic drunk me.

sad i didnt get a photostrip with niina tho

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m a n i a c

I just asked my parents if I could skip my cousin's wedding in Melbourne for Knockout. Their answer was a solid no. I just want some lasers is that too much to ask.......

Social anxiety peaking the entire weekend

Went out for my sister's birthday thing last night and like I had a mechatronics assignment due at midnight but I managed to pull it out of my ass (and leech of Stephen's friends) to get it done in time. Why does this always happen???? Arrived at El Loco on Sussex street and so much anxiety cus I knew none of her friends but it was ok cus I saw my cousins.

Anyway had the funniest conversation with my sister's high school friend Othilia and turns out she's in the same Enactus team as Niina and SHE HAD SO MUCH GOSS I WAS LIVINGGGG we have the same mind XD. 100% on people who feel the same way as me glad I am not alone.

It was funnn had a bit too much wine HAHAHA then messaged Selz and she was out too so cousin Amy and I went to hunt them down all the way in Chinatown. It was just Alan, Darren and Selz but had a chill time. We bought emperor puffs and they full burnt my mouth but so yummmm. THEN WENT HOMEEE was such a wholesome night but I was so drunk.

can u believe this was the only photo I took that entire night

Today had birthday yum cha for my sister at Burwood. Back at my favourite treee XD. But had a project meeting via call just before lunch but really didn't need to be there so eH

i cannot believe lizzie made this her cover photo smh

Then went shopping with my mumma and she bought me new sneakers yeeeeeeeet finally chucking out my old af Nike ones.

still feel like im suffering from dq withdrawals atm. godddddamn legit so sad can't go Knockout :( This reminds me of like that New Years when my mum didn't let me go out and I ended up crying at home alone because my sister dogged me too and then they felt so bad they offered to drive me to Brighton Le Sands to join up with my friends.

Also I've turned into a reckless spender......................... you only live once right???

BUT ITS OK lol uni almost over I WILL HAVE FUNNN!!

shit i can't concentrate

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WE ARE THE FALLEN

Just realised I use copious amounts of XD's when I'm talking to people I don't know that well LMAO

ALSO YA yeet starting to do PR stuff for WIESoc and its kinda fun? I don't know hahaha we'll see how long this motivation lasts for

also I'm missing defqon i can't wait for next years HAHAHA wth is happening to me??? I'm watching so many vids on HMAS and being sad. Now I understand why people get so sad after raves. I feel like its another plane of existence when you're there. and then you go home and its all over. HOLY FUCK I sound so cooked.

WE ARE THE FALLEN

I LOVE THIS SONG SOSOSOSOSO MUCH HOLY SHIT ITS SO GOOD I KEEP LISTENING TO IT AND LIKE EVERY TIME I HEAR IT I THINK OF THE LIGHTS AND THE LASERS MANNNNNN im so happy someone uploaded it ---------->  https://www.facebook.com/xsu.ayex/videos/1907878279268495/

Tuesday 

uhhh i think i may or may not have driven to uni?? I don't remember hahaha. All the days are blending together. Stayed back pretty late at uni studying.

Wednesday

Study study did pr stuff TOOK PHOTOS of people, went to my lab but turns out the demonstrator didn't save my data so I had to go back in the next day to do it again smh. 

Got drunk at Chir Chir Chicken with my fellow alcoholics hehehe. 

pove pove pove

Thursday

mman2100 tute, nothing much happened. I studied. I took photos. I talked to the PR directors for quite a bit about what is happening next year. I think I may have found my IT director!!!! Did my mtrn3020 2nd lab again and made sure they saved my data this time.

been buying ice coffees recently from the corner cafe near IGA and bro they are so good.

YA YEET im so keEN.

WENT BACK TO HOME TO TUTOR LILY AND THEN SHE CANCELLED ON ME WHEN I WAS ON THE TRAIN SMh. so SO POOR. 

I miss defqon?

hehehe I want to be happy

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defqon & Raw Challenge

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17/09/19 4:56 pm Hilmer Building Level 2

Amy Lim: I'm never taking 2 caps ever again

Phuc Nguyen: I'm definitely baking brownies next time

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DEFQON. 1 (SATURDAY)

Drove to Brenda's house at around 1:45 pm, dropped my car off then her parents drove us to Mascot Station. Took the train to Central, then switched to Penrith train. Ran into Will Sexton and gf on the train. Phuc was dumb and took the wrong train so we just met up with Lizzie who got on at Strathfield.

Saw Phuc at the bus stop outside Penrith then headed to DQ. on the way there Phuc pulled out a bag of lollipops and was like I have lollipops for everyone!! not realising that you weren't allowed to bring them in so Lizzie, Brenda and I had to shove them everywhere smh. Lizzie somehow fit 7 lollipops in her bra HAHAHAHAH.

Nothing much happened in the first few hoursssss we tried to find people like VSA and Lizzie's boyfriend Jez.

Then we ran into like all of UNSW and everyone was sober except for Andy who was so happy but apparently he was tripping ballsacks cus he had a full tab? I don't even know. 

Phuc and I having a bit of a moment at the Blue Stage before we found VSA. 

Before we were about to buy chippies.

But like once we got to red stage and the sun set, everything was just so littttttt.

IT WAS A GOOD TIME HEHEHEHE. We hung around Lizzie's group for most of the time like with Jez and Shabab and some other YS. But Shabab was sososososo nice and was full like I'LL TAKE CARE OF U.

Anyway he gave me a nang and was transported to another dimension. Like legit the world was all black and then when I opened my eyes, a portal opened and Jez and Lizzie pulled me out of the portal back into Defqon. Legit was the highlight of my night.

I didn't know it ended so early was so still like really hyper towards the end and I made Brenda and Marcus from matsci dance with me at Magenta Stage. We all fell asleep in the bus line tho. 

RAW CHALLENGE (SUNDAY)

Woke up way too fucking early the next day to drive to Amy's house and we surprised Stephen!! Amy drove us all to some random place in the Central Coast and like we did the Raw Challenge which is three hour long mud course thing with downgraded Wipeout / American Ninja Warrior obstacles. IT WAS WHACK. I was so cold and so tired after about 1.5 hrs of it but overall I am glad I did it hehehe. The funniest part was when I was watching Eugene, Amy and Stephen struggle in a massive pit of doom and I just looked at them with 0 regret.

Next time lol reminder to self, wear tights and gloves and go in the summer.

We all conked out in the car ride back. I woke up at some point and we were pulled up on the side of the road. Everyone was just sleeping cus Stephen had to stop revive and survive.

Dropped Eugene off then we went to the korean place we always go to in Campsie. It was delicious :)))

Then went back to Stephen's house, freshened up and pumped out my MMAN3000 assignment until 11:47. it was due at 11:50 XD

THEN DROVE HOMMEEEEEEEEEEE

BACK TO UNI (MONDAY)

Slept in a bit, then drove to uni, then hung out with Phuc, Amy Lim, Andy and Jo. Saw Matsci peeps briefly and Brenda kept laughing at how cooked I was during Defqon. 

Worked on WIESoc for most of the day smh. SO TIRED.

Amy was full getting cold shakes cus she was scat.

probs going to go home late tonightttt cus so much tO DO

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Super Excited Really Excellent Nice Awkward (AGM 2018)

I have never need Jesus to take the wheel so fucking badly

This MMAN3000 assignment is stressing me out so so so badly because I have no idea what I'm doing even after three days of reading research papers............................................

who is the new vice president (public relations) of WIESoc? This MESS. Naomi just called talking about director apps being launched NEXT THURSDAY and shit is getting a bit too real. HAHHAHA keen to get to choose my own team tho never done that before XD

Tuesday

had like a mini breakdown that night because lol. worked at Ainsworth because my laptop ran outta batts.

when the dick shaped object showed up immediately after I took this photo JUST JOKING xD

Did my app that night and included the photo of me as Jack Sparrow for good measure.

Wednesday

Got to uni at 8 am ish and still couldn't find good parking wtf????

Went to Ainsworth to keep dong MMAN, ran into Rachael from BESS and complained about this assignment with her. Kept crying inside. Had our last WIESoc 2018 team meeting ever then continued dying. Took a momentary break from dying when I met up with Suvekchhya to teach her some photoshop. Then continued dying with Jo.

Drove Jo home for the first time ever but because I drank all her milk tea and water I really needed to pee so I had to go into her grandma's house to pee lol felt so awkward. But her grandma is so nice. also had a phat rant about tues night to her and she understood which idk if she's just saying because I'm actually a psycho sometimes. And she told me what to do before/during DQ because she's such a rave rat. 

Thursday (WIESoc AGM 2018)

Spent the whole day yesterday not doing anything but chilling and writing my speech. Got to uni at 9 am for MMAN2100 tutorial then went to matsci but it got so noisy in there so I went outside the lifts to chill by myself.

Wandered around with Brenda and Niina for a bit doing errands, buying chalk. This is Brenda crying over how inept her VP is.

Selz sent my entire recorded speech to VSA and can I just say I want to neck myself....

I was so nervous and like I physically couldn't stop myself from shaking when I got up there but heyyyy I GOT THE POSITION YA YEET. public speaking is NOT MY THING. also a bit awks because one of the girls I was running against came up to me afterwards and said something along the lines of letting her become a director?? I was so confused. 

Also the other girl who ran against me like hugged me afterwards and said congratulations and she sounded so genuine and had no disappointment in her voice at all and that was soooooo nice.

also lol niina and I kept looking at each other after the AGM like in disbelief that we both somehow managed to both get into exec. ALSO BRO LOOK AT THIS CAKE ANGELA MADE IM SHOOK IT SO PRETTTTTTTYTYTYTYTYTYTYT. So happy Angela is on the team again because she can bake for us all the time now. 

And ofc we need to token male in our Women In Engineering Society XD

Riya made this super emotional speech thanking the old execs at the end and omg Aileen actually cried I was shook. It was cute tho. 

Went to Newtown later and joined Amy, Andrew, Eugene, Mei and Stephen for Andrew's farewell since he's going on exchange. We had Italian and went to Holey Moley afterwards. It was fun lmaoooo I think I have a talent for putt putt not even a joke. 

this was us trying to take a nice photo but the lighting was too intense so stephen had to stand up and block it for us.

 MEI WHY DO U LOOK SO UPSET HAHAHAHAHAHA

gang

FREE 2 scoops of messina using the Liven app y'alls should... hop on it. AS ALWAYS coconut and lychee soooooooooooooooooooooo good and the salted caramel white choc one as well nomnomnom.

special tenks to my peeps who came to AGM to support my shaking ass but yeah I was so like genuinely grateful that people who said they were gonna show up actually did ABSOLUTELY SHOOK shaken stirred.

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the situation is quite dire

every second post on this blog is so depressing what the heck HAHAHA

I is ok I is also drowning in uni and feelings of inadequacy but issa ok

I'm procrastinating so much from doing my work but like I'm out here watching movie trailers hehehe so keen to see The Miseducation of Cameron Post and Boy Erased hello yeet yeet

Tuesday

holy fuck I have never wanted to kick someone so bad

phat rant below. I always question whether or not I'm a bad person and I feel like I am because this shouldn't affect me as much as it does and idk why I deal with it the way I do by just like being angry and hateful but yenno what I'M SO FUCKING MAD

WOW I honestly don't why I'm so triggered by him all the time oh wait I do know lmao 

Amy Lim offering up the realest advice but I cant just be ok one minute and then next be like "fucking bye not driving you home anymore"

but holy shit SHIT i need to remember my anger tonight because I am literally never saying yes again SO FUCKING ANNOYING "OMG YOU PARKED SOOOOOO FAR" well then don't fucking ask me to drive you home

HOLY FUCK FUCK and I wanted to be mean I really did but I couldnt like what am I supposed to say????????????????? I don't understand people that know its an inconvenience that still ask. DO U HAVE NO FUCKING IDK WHAT U CALL IT LIKE COMMON COURTESY? and like can u not see that I clearly don't want to say yes??? like hello?? do u have eyes??? DO U HAVE AN FUCKING SENSOR TO PICK UP SOMEONE ELSES MOOD hello HELLO IS UR BRAIN IN YOUR HEAD YIKES

HOLY FUCK im so triggered AND THEN YOU JSUT GONNA ACT LIKE WE DIDN'T HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT THIS WHERE I LITERALLY SPELT IT OUT FOR YOU ALREAYD AND YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL BUT YET YET YOU STILL DO THIS like what in the fuckery I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE this is making me so madddddd I literally wanted to punch everyone

ANYWAY phew got that off my chest and lol if either of them read that but honestly there is a limit to what I can take.

anyway, I need to solve this problem.

WORKING ON MY VP PR APP RN YAYAYYA HAVING LOTS OF FUN CUS THERES NO PRESSURE HAHAHAHHA

drove to uni today and worked on my 25% thesis proposal for most of the day. also did a bit of sketching for my mman2100 group project. didn't think the day would end like this but I should've known.

As a VP, you are both a leader and team member. What team dynamic do you want to create and what qualities do you have to facilitate that? (400 words)

yeet x 400

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