I don't want to complain and be a weak bitch anymore but yesterday I had some pretty s h i t thoughts but yo its life so we just get on with it. Trying to shut off the emotional section of my brain but turn on the learning one because I have 2 days to learn 6 weeks of mman and I literally want to nek myself to doing this to myself.
I'm so fucking dumb.
was feeling so shit from all the project work I had to do so on the way home yeet was DJing and she put on some sad song and I legit was SO close to bawling and then she was like um do you want some happy music and I was like yes
also studied alone for a bit after tony, phuc and dalena left because ceebs going back to the people who don't give a fuck (or I won't let give a fuck) (or I can't handle being in the same room with) (or just hate myself for being so stupid) (or I simply don't know well enough) (or you can remember all their faces not wanting you to be there) (or all of the above) and I was zoning in and out of my lecture thinking about memories and then you get calls from people who use you and don't give a fuck about you and it just gets worse and the one thing that will make u feel better will eventually make u feel worse so...
heard them laughing about how alone I was and I literally wanted to fucking disappear.
but karma I guess for me being a piece of shit to other people
went home and sooked a bit with my cat who was being a fucking spaz and I felt sad for her because she probs waits at home and I only play with her when I feel like it. parallel for how I treat people in my life? lol.
literally wondering if I just disappeared one day would I would be happier? maybe I should go somewhere during winter break.
I don't even know anymoreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I am finding comfort in my ride or dies today and being sad because it will never go back to how it was. I don't want my sadness to turn into anger because I don't want to be angry.
ok nvm I'm both sad and angry now they just go hand in hand. I'm sad because there's currently a misunderstanding and I'm not going to clear it up because no and on the other hand I'm just angry because I've realised I'm just another blip on the radar
finding solace in movies again I guess
ASDFLAKSBFJLAKSDJFLAKSJDF THE TRAILER FOR FIRST MAN CAME OUT AND FUCK IT LOOKS SO GOOD I have literal chills. Dunno if just hype because its Damien Chazelle XD. IM KEEN AS A BEAN FOR THIS.
I'm so fucking dumb.
was feeling so shit from all the project work I had to do so on the way home yeet was DJing and she put on some sad song and I legit was SO close to bawling and then she was like um do you want some happy music and I was like yes
also studied alone for a bit after tony, phuc and dalena left because ceebs going back to the people who don't give a fuck (or I won't let give a fuck) (or I can't handle being in the same room with) (or just hate myself for being so stupid) (or I simply don't know well enough) (or you can remember all their faces not wanting you to be there) (or all of the above) and I was zoning in and out of my lecture thinking about memories and then you get calls from people who use you and don't give a fuck about you and it just gets worse and the one thing that will make u feel better will eventually make u feel worse so...
heard them laughing about how alone I was and I literally wanted to fucking disappear.
but karma I guess for me being a piece of shit to other people
went home and sooked a bit with my cat who was being a fucking spaz and I felt sad for her because she probs waits at home and I only play with her when I feel like it. parallel for how I treat people in my life? lol.
literally wondering if I just disappeared one day would I would be happier? maybe I should go somewhere during winter break.
I don't even know anymoreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I am finding comfort in my ride or dies today and being sad because it will never go back to how it was. I don't want my sadness to turn into anger because I don't want to be angry.
ok nvm I'm both sad and angry now they just go hand in hand. I'm sad because there's currently a misunderstanding and I'm not going to clear it up because no and on the other hand I'm just angry because I've realised I'm just another blip on the radar
This song is legit so sad what the hell troye you didn't have to do that. You know when you finally realise what a song is about and it just hits u like atruck.
had a weird dream last night about all this shit and it was actually whack HAHAHAHA
had a weird dream last night about all this shit and it was actually whack HAHAHAHA
finding solace in movies again I guess
ASDFLAKSBFJLAKSDJFLAKSJDF THE TRAILER FOR FIRST MAN CAME OUT AND FUCK IT LOOKS SO GOOD I have literal chills. Dunno if just hype because its Damien Chazelle XD. IM KEEN AS A BEAN FOR THIS.
Claire Foy is killing ittttttt she's in First Man but lol the trailer for The Girl in the Spider's Web came out like 3 days ago as well. but it looks shit so eh and the comment below r giving me life.
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