Live Blogging the Oscars

LA LA LAND GOT SNATCHED!  

So below are a series of really incoherent statements / exclamations I made during the 89th Academy Awards. Moonlight SNATCHED best picture off La La Land in the most dramatic conclusion to the Academy Awards ever. Here are some of my thoughts. Also putting them here because no one was free to watch with me :(

Channelling my inner Harge during the whole red carpet: WHERE IS SHE GODDAMMIT 

"too bad she's in a cave casting witch spells with leaf bottom"

Best Supporting Actor - Mahershala Ali

Yo miss ghost RM made an appearance in Dev's Lion nomination clip. That's about all we're going to get. Sad Dev didn't win though :( 

Makeup & Hairstyling - Suicide Squad

I have no fucking words what the fuck

Costume Design - Fantastic Beasts

OOOOOH LA LA LAND GOT SNATCHED BY FANTASTIC BEASTS HAHHAH 

OMG MOANA SINGING HOW FAR I'LL GO the rap intro at the beginning by lin manuel was SO GOOD i need to listen to him rap/sing some more its so nice

I thought the girl with Mel Gibson was his daughter.......... help she's 26 hes 60 HE HAS CHILDREN OLDER THAN HER WTF

Best Sound Mixing - Hacksaw Ridge

ok keep going by categories I don't care about. lmao did I hear correctly??? "21st nomination and 1st win???" wtf so unlucky

Best Supporting Actress - Viola Davis
Someone teach Nicole Kidman how to clap

Best Animated Feature - Zootopia
Kubo didn't win. Bye.

Best Editing - Hacksaw Ridge ??

Why the fuck did Hacksaw Ridge win this WHAT THE FUCK HAHAHAHA la la land is getting snatched by everything

Mean tweets segment was not funny at all 

I feel ripped off why are Emma and Ryan not singing

Will be here forever waiting for a live performance of City of Stars. Who knows maybe it'll become a classic like Sound of Music then Emma and Ryan have to come back and sing for the 50th anniversary or some shit

Best Original Score - La La
Hello Justin Hurwitz u are a god

Best Original Song - La La
City of Stars better win or or immmmmma cut someone - YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS CITY OF STARS YAYAYAY BEST SONG ryan gosling better stop with those kind eyes

ok here comes the in memoriam section

SARA BAREILLES OMG WHAT
Her voice is so beautiful - I don't know this song

Best Original Screenplay - Manchester By the Sea
cmon MANCHESTER LA LA PROBABLY GNA WIN OMGGGGGGGGGG MANCHESTER WON WTFFFF HOLY SHIT LA LA LAND GOT REKT HOLY SHITTITITITITTITITITITIT

aye Amy Adams has showed up yass bitch

Best Adapted Screenplay - Moonlight
Come on Lion / Moonlight OK MOONLIGHT JUST WON GG wow no one is sweeping anything everything is going to diff movies

Best Director - Damien Chazelle
ok wtf I just realised chick with afro was Halle Berry. I thought she was just a random HAHAHA. OK CMON DAMIEN PLEASEEEEEEEEEEE PLEASE GIVE IT TO HIM YAYAYAYYA SO HAPPY FOR HIM HEHEHE he sitll looks like he has pneumonia or something BUT OMG. please don't pass out. His shoutout to his wife was so cute.

Chrissy what was that chin stroke.

Ok time to get hyped for Best Actress :O

Best Actor - Casey Affleck
QUEEN BRIE LARSON GONNA HAVE TO HAND THAT OSCAR OVER TO THE SEXUAL PREDATOR CASEY AFFLECK I LOVE THis song. ok this nomination reel is really long. WHY SHE GOTTA SHADE CASEY LIKE THAT OMFG HER FACE IS LITERALLY LIKE FUCK MY LIFE ok she gave him a kiss on the cheek that ain't that mean

Poor Brie Larson. All season long. #Oscars pic.twitter.com/XntqKloUUE

— Jarett Wieselman (@JarettSays) February 27, 2017

YASSS HOBO CASEY

this tweet is the most savage thing I've ever seen

wow he is really unpopular on Tumblr

Ok a break for Dev and Sunny appreciation

Best Actress - Emma Stone
Ok going for da Emma Stone leggo girl. YAYYY GIRL GET IT OK PLS DON'T HAVE A BORING SPEECH. ok she's so happy I'm getting emotional. SHE NEEDS TO BREATHE.

jfc so happy for them both

Best Picture - La La Land JOKES Moonlight
Ok Moonlight vs La La Land here we gooooooooooooooooo. ok RM showed up in the lion nom clip YES yes yes yes ok i lose this nomination reel there are so many movies BASICALLY ADS FOR ALL OF THEM WATCH MOVIES BITCHES

oh lordy the suspense is so real CMON YAYYYYY SO HAPPY FOR THEM HEHEHE

LA LA LAND 7 OSCARS YAS GAGA go down in history plox FILM TWITTER GOING OFF because Moonlight didn't win hahaha

oh my god

MOONLIGHT WON
WTF
WT
F
WT
F
WT
W
T
W
W


FJALKEJF;A
WELKFJAWLKEJFAWE
RWHOLY
HSIT
ITOSLTRJ;LK
HOLY
SHIT



OMFG
BIGGEST
WTF
OF
THEFUCKING
NIGHT
WTHAAAAAAAAAA


AHSDFAJHSDKJF
HOLY
SHIT
WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT

AWJKEHFALKJ
WEFKAWEF
OMG
IM SHOOK
IM
SHOOK

IM SHOOK

HOLY SHIT OMFG THIS IS THE WORST MIX UP IN THE HISTORY OF THE OSCARS

OMG
OMG
HOLY LORD

LORDDDDD
FUCK THIS

OMF
OH JESUS

OH LORD FILM TWITTER GOING OFF BEING LIKE THIS IS THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED

OK IDK I FEEL REALLY SAD FOR LA LA LAND THAT SUCKS SHIT FOR THEM REALLY OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG THIS

IM SO SHOOK HOLY SHIT oh lord you can see Damien's dead dead soul in the background

ok I'm done basically what happened was they had the best actress envelope instead of the best picture won so the guy read "La La Land" cus Emma stone won before but Moonlight actually won HAHAHAH shit they fucked up.

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Y'all thought I was done with this post but no.

This. Is. Truth.