Wednesday, 1 February 2017

mood

I had the weirdest dream. It was HSC year and Lulu was thinking of doing Una for her discovery text and I needed to buy new 3u and 4u workbooks and Lilymaymac was cheating on her girlfriend and my fam and I were on holiday but for some reason all our belongings filled up a supermarket store so we were dreading packing our stuff up... also I needed French vocab from Ms Grant but Tammy gave it to me.

Started my new class today. I kind of want to die. I'll just leave it at that. I was kind of an asshole to this girl today who came in late and was behind for the rest of the lesson........ 1 week down, about 39 to go.
OH MY GOD when you send out a bored message to your tumblr followers telling them how bored you are then someone actually pops up and starts talking to you IS THIS REAL LIFE but awareness of social awkwardness and anxiety still applies online ok we having a conversation about his/her broken foot its all good

I think daily (kinda) blogging is a lil unhealthy because you have nothing to talk about in person since they know everything about you. That, or maybe just the fact I can't talk to people.

Maybe people without earlobes are actually more evolved humans because they have less surface area near their face for predators to grab onto. After all, the purpose of the outer ear is to funnel sound into your inner ear canal and I cannot think of a single reason how an earlobe would aid that process.

dese violent delights have violent ends

I randomly texted Stephen on Amy's phone: "thesaurus vanguard, ethereal, ephemeral" and because he is such a good boyfriend he actually did and I wish I had a screenshot of this but basically he sent back the synonyms and then Amy texted him back saying how mad she was then we called him and I pretended that Amy was really upset and crying and he was so worried and he was like "why are you so upset" and then she was like "because thesaurus sounds like a dinosaur" and he was so genuinely confused but still believed that she was upset over that.
Fuck yas I love movies especially this one why did I not love analysing movies back in year 12 when we actually had to do this for marks
 
I appreciate you all I hope you are doing swell even though I feel like I'm talking into an empty room sometimes. Hope you are doing better than me in this game called life where you win or you die its like one of those days where I honestly do not believe anyone has my fucked up perspective on people and interactions and personality and yes. 

Do I even have a personality? I cannot describe myself anymore. I am an empty shell prepared to fill myself up what normal people are meant to say and how they're meant to act but there really is NOTHING going on inside me. I have no thoughts and feelings except for the ones where I think to myself, "I have no thoughts and feelings". The only thing I am sure of right now is that we will all be forgotten one day and our tiny existences will be meaningless so why do we try so hard to live. (also I really want to see A Ghost Story and Stephen promised he would see it with me Amy didn't promise but whatever she said she didn't want to commit)

To Stephen (and Amy):

“Well, you can't break an Unbreakable Vow...."
"I'd worked that much out for myself, funnily enough. What happens if you break it, then?"
"You die," said Ron simply. 



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